Saturday September 25th. A day I will never forget! :( So the boys all needed haircuts. And this was the second day in a row I woke up to what looked like to be a small dog on my pillow. It was becoming a mess and noticeable in several areas that there was no hair. So I had to do it! The thing you all know I have been avoiding. It was very very very hard. I cryed of course. I was fine until the lady said to me how are you feeling about this? I couldn't even get words out. The tears just came. There was a guy getting his haircut next to me and he kept assuring me I would be fine and that it looked great! Yeah I'm thinking if your going for the GI Jane look or Shenae O'Connor. This is not me making a fashion statement. So Enrique my little guy says to me mommy wheres your hair? Again here came the tears. We are in the car and I'm calming down a little and Mariana says to me Mom are you ok? I said yeah I'm just sad and again here came the tears. Then Christian says to me I don't know if this matters or will help but you really don't look that different and I'm sure you can guess............YES here came the tears again!! It was a very emotional day for me. Its gonna take some time to get use to it. When I first saw my reflection I was in tears all over again. I wake up every morning to see myself like this and its just a daily reminder that my life is just not normal right now. It is very uncomfortable and hard to sleep. Its like little needles poking you in your head. I hate going anywhere by myself because I feel like I'm being starred at. I'm gonna get a shirt that says YES I HAVE CANCER!!!! This way there is no question.
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| crying |
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| crying |
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| still crying |
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| SOOOOOO not a happy camper! |
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| Mariana said so mom do you not want to take pictures anymore? So this is our picture :) |
All I can say is I LOVE your Braveness as well as your personal resolve! You are a testimony to strength and I truly believe that you will give people so much courage as well as inspiration by your story. Mandy, You are touching people that you don't even know by this strength and transparency into your life. THANK YOU for being so willing and verbal! YOU WILL KICK ITS A@#!
ReplyDeletePraying always!
Nettie
I think you look great! I love the picture of you and Mariana. BTW, I forgot to tell you I got some info from my friend Amy regarding wigs. She said the Cancer Society will give you one for free and she likes wishirewigs.com and to make sure that it has a monfilament part (scalp) b/c it's made better. Hope this helps! You're doing great!
ReplyDeleteMandy you have such beauty both inside and out! I know your hair was very important to you and all that you are going through truly just plain SUCKS! But you are still the same beautiful person you always were. You should be SO PROUD of yourself for all the difficulties you have had to face and conquered. You truly are beautiful and your smile just lights up your face! Stay strong, you WILL beat this!
ReplyDeleteBald can be beautiful and you prove it everyday. I love the picture of you and Mariana and I love that you took that picture...it is one more statement to cancer- f@#% you, you will not control this life!
ReplyDeleteAwesome pictures! Don't forget to duck tape your head when the stubble starts to hurt. It really works and doesn't hurt one bit. I KNOW THAT BALD IS BEAUTIFUL!!! Now you look like me:-)
ReplyDeleteYou look beautiful!!! Your daily strength is what is going to get you through all of this. You are truly a remarkable woman!
ReplyDeleteYour beautiful!!!! Your gonna kick butt and be better real soon!!!! Love: Kim & Kristen : )
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